The toddler survival guide: complete protection from the whiny unfed
Get the baby gates, lock the cupboards, and load up Elmo's Song, toddlers are on the loose. The Toddler Survival Guide is here to get you to the other side. Toddlers and zombies both communicate mainly through groans, clumsily trail after you everywhere you go (especially into the bathroom in the toddler's case), and--upon entering your life--leave you frazzled, on edge, and deeply sleep deprived.
The Toddler Survival Guide is a hilarious parody of Max Brooks's The Zombie Survival Guide (and survival guides in general) that will leave parents laughing out loud even as it provides practical advice on how they can make it to the other side of toddlerhood intact. Written by parents who have studied toddlers up-close in their natural habitat, the book will cover survival skills including how you can outfit your home to outlast a toddler occupation (baby gate, cabinet locks, wine), how you can subdue an angry toddler ("Elmo's Song," mac and cheese, smartphone) and even how you can safely venture out in public together without your toddler--or you--bursting into tears.
Chapters include: Preparing the Home for a Toddler Invasion, Communicating with Your Toddler, Feeding a Toddler, Socializing Your Toddler, Grooming Your Toddler, Venturing into Public with a Toddler, Documenting Your Life with a Toddler, Vacationing with a Toddler, Toddler Entertainment and Birthdays, Surviving Bedtime and Potty Training, Technology and the Toddler, and Parental Self-Preservation.
|Grouped Work ID||436b5c8f-259a-6016-53d8-7eadeb071836|
|full_title||toddler survival guide complete protection from the whiny unfed|
|detailed_location_arlington||Shirlington New Nonfiction|
|display_description||"The Toddler Survival Guide is a hilarious parody that will leave parents laughing even as it provides practical advise on how they can make it through toddlerhood intact"--|
|item_details||ils:.b19899440|.i21430536|Shirlington New Nonfiction|817 SPOHR|||1|false|false|||||On Shelf|Sep 30, 2017|sann|||
|local_time_since_added_arlington||Six Months, Year|
|owning_library_arlington||Arlington Public Library, Aurora Hills, Central, Cherrydale, Columbia Pike, Connection Crystal City, Detention Center, Glencarlyn, Local History, Plaza, Shirlington, Westover|
|record_details||ils:.b19899440|Book|Books||English|Voyageur Press,|2017.|191 pages : illustrations ; 21 cm.|
|scoping_details_arlington||ils:.b19899440|.i21430536|On Shelf|On Shelf|false|true|true|false|false|true|999||||
|subject_facet||Child rearing -- Humor, Parenting -- Humor, Toddlers -- Humor|
|title_display||The toddler survival guide : complete protection from the whiny unfed|
|title_full||The toddler survival guide : complete protection from the whiny unfed / Mike & Heather Spohr|
|title_short||The toddler survival guide :|
|title_sub||complete protection from the whiny unfed|