In stitches: a memoir

Prologue: The face in the ceiling

1. Premed. Karate kid ; Jawzilla ; Zero for four years

2. First year. Little Asia ; Master of the shopping cart ; A show of hands ; Nerd room

3. Second year. Flower street ; No, but I play one on TV ; Second-year crush

4. Third year. First do no harm ... oops ; Role model ; "Miracle of birth occurs for 83 billionth time!" ; If you don't cut, you suck ; Shrink rap ; This is spinal tap ; Mommy dearest

5. Fourth year. Thanksgiving story ; Beverly Hills bloodsuckers ; Monkey time! ; Match madness.